Sorry, I have to go home and feed my nepotisms
Sorry, I can't talk, there's a herd of nepotisms headed my way
my mom just informed me my dog smells like cum
you traded sex for a burrito?
she was seriously choking and the whole time all he kept saying was "that's what she said"
I don't even have to turn the heat on in my car. Just fart the whole way home.
you both peed in the photobooth after the pictures were taken.
I found my underwear on the sidewalk 8 blocks from her house while on my walk of shame. I also found our beer bag and a full beer in the bush.
we're like Indians of the 21st century. trading not for food and survival but personal gain and by trouble you mean getting daytime drunk and going to the roller ring then yes.
So I get to my parents and walk in the door so my mom knows I'm safe and alive and my grandpa looks at me and says "were you being someone's bitch". And I about died of laughter
Wow, he seems so solid
you were drunkenly making out with a 20-something in front of your wife. at least the guy your wife left with was decent looking.
Wait is this black Chris #1, cocaine Chris, or gay Chris?
No this is saxophone Chris
Also, if asking a guy to come over and watch curling with you doesn't scream let's fuck then idk what does
Like if it it's practical for your sexual health I'm allergic to it AKA REGULAR CONDOMS
If you could not mention to him that I slept with his best friend, that'd be cool of you.
I can't believe just smoked out of a pear
I can't believe you had a pear already made to smoke out of, that was impressive
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