I miss him.. What the hell did I get myself in to? I guess it will get better with time.
No. Just liquor. Time's no good.
...i had to draw her a diagram of her own vagina. including a little arrow to the clitoris. shouldn't it be the other way around?!?
i'm drinking with a bunch of phds, i feel very stupid but good about my drinking abilities
this islike a room full of reasons why i should be in prison
I just ate four packages of Swiss Rolls. Being high and on food stamps is AHmazing.
I'm considering failing out of my last semester of college just so I can keep fucking him.
P.S. I just watched The Muppets. I feel like I just got a sadness enema.
You get drunk and try to bury your girlfriend in the sand JUST ONCE and all hell breaks loose
Well its official, I'm into significantly freakier sex than even I thought possible.
She deliberately backed into the homewrecker's whoremobile and yelled ""FOR SPARTA!"
He has great taste in girls. I feel closer to my Eskimo sisters than my real sister...
We share an apartment, weed and genitals. It's called being practical not in love.
I have wine with a bendy straw bitches I can do fucking anything
Dude if I had a dollar for everytime she asked me to do weird shit with her when we were fucking I'd have like 4$
I used to want you to marry him...Now I just think you deserve a bigger penis than that.
Randomize
