I dinstinctly remember making out to "I believe I can fly" and waving my arms like a bird to the beat.
yeah, you were trying to hump the doorman.
when did we get a doorman?
we were also in the wrong building...
he said i was so drunk that i shared a urinal with him and we simultainiously peed
i am too hungover to go to class can you just call me and put it on speaker phone
They're calling for 20 inches of snow but I'll have a dirtbike for emergency trips to the liquor store. Even if I crash it won't hurt.
This is the last weekend of getting drunk and having sex all nite with the plumber. I'm exhausted all weekend and I'm never going to finish the remodel at this rate
I guess it was to be expected that I was put on somebody's list called penis socket.
I bought an american flag today and by god im gonna fuck someone on it
I kept resisting the urge to yell "2 for 2!" so they could hear me on the other side of the wall.
then he grabbed my tit and yelled "FOR NARNIA!!" then dove into my vag. i think I will do him again strictly for the entertainment value
like are we talking 'quick beer' bad or 'break out the real vodka' bad
literally 50% of my time being 20 has involved my genitals thus far
It's cool dude. The dank is in the form of premade smores with honey grahm crackers, marshmallow cream and 420 brand choc. bars. NV weed laws have nothing on me.
Some people are good at football, some people are good at painting, and he's good at being a fuckboy. Everyone has their talents.
I'm sorry i showed you my boobs.. I probably shouldn't have done that.
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