okay so using the row boat as a giant snow sled probably wasn't the best idea.
Apparently 'she used to sleep with my brother' is not an acceptable answer to how do you know each other.
The woman exiting the men's room tried convincing me she was actually a good-looking man.
she had that "i just got used" look on her face when i kicked her out at 5am
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On an unrelated note: I'm also a big advocate of the "never waste a boner" theory.
Think I just saw your homeless guy on High Street. Did you give him back his crutch?
Im the macgyver of cooling down beers. The toilet tank was blocked so I couldn't use it.....
... why is there a bottle of pee on my headboard?
I am coping with the snow storm with beer and shots of jack. If I were outside in shorts I might be able to pass as a Canadian.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We went from zero to drunk tank in 45 minutes.
I offered him midol and told him "it always helps my period so maybe it'll help yours"
Rum and your dick are involved. You're relying on the unreliable narrator.
Still can’t get over the fact that we ate beef jerky off a strip club floor
it's like the easy bake oven version of plastic surgery
He expects a blow job at the movies but won’t pay for popcorn? Does he know it’s not 2017 anymore
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