sometimes i wonder what i would do without sheltered catholic girls w/ overprotective parents
never have sex?
I mean, there was frosting being put on a tunafish sandwich. Pretty sure she knew we were high.
I don't even know what beauty is right now. I wouldn't even pity fuck me today.
Btw after this weekend the chipndales costume has a 125% success rate.
also, the amount of semen in my carpet right now is unforgivable...
Come my child we shall walk thru the pasture of amazing sex and corndogs. Hint:some corndogs are not corndogs.
do you know how ratchet you have to be to get kicked out of a drag club on Halloween weekend??
Well he's a 33 year old furniture salesman that picked up at 19 year old buying a bedroom set for her room. I can see how that would be awkward
Still stoned. I like your bong. It can stay. No others, though.
My roommate just threatened to kill me with my own pan. Can I ever get away from the crazies?!
Sitting naked in my bed eating leftover Mexican food drinking coors light.. Can it get any more single than this?
What'd I miss?
Erotic hypnosis and studded dog collars.
So I justmade it back home and was greeted to a squirrel in my dorm... Last time I let my friends rent it out for a party.
don't think less of me for this, but i'm pretty sure he did a line off my boob last night.
I just found my phone after looking for it since yesterday afternoon it was in the fridge.
Randomize
