My milkshake brings 85 to 90 percent of the boys to the yard
week 6 of class: i have yet to go to spanish sober. i love being THAT girl.
Just taught my suite how to queef. I feel like i'm back in 9th grade!
official worst smell ever. a used condom that has gone through the dryer.
it feels good to walk into a CVS and not go straight to the pharmacy counter for plan b. its been a while....
Get here now. This is going to be possibly my most dangerous idea ever, and I'm the guy who challenged a hobo to a breakdance fight.
Stealing vibrators from Walmart together was when I realized you'd be my Maid of Honor.
Everything tastes like hotdogs and shame.
Hey do you know who I showed my dick to at the bar last night?
I'm tempted to randomly yell out 'SO HOW IS YOUR UNDERAGE GIRLFRIEND' but that would be callous
I apologize in advance for the number of sex toys drying on the bathroom sink.
You kidnapped her dog. I don't care that you and the dog are epic bros, that's just not cool. Return him.
Let's put it this way, there's not many girls I wouldn't let sit on my face
Stop chatting and get in the fucking car. I didn't get my asexual ass out of bed just to watch you flirt and fail with someone you're never going to see again.
can you come here so we can have really loud sex? the girl upstairs walks so loud i want her to know how it feels
of course
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