Yo I charged a $20 breakfast to ur room, will pay u back in liquor and schoolgirl panties, thx again for a fun time
I have a masturbator in my 5th grade class. the teacher told me ever since they caught him humping the desk in 2nd grade, they haven't been able to control him. he's even on medication but he will just do it in class
I think I have a pornographic memory.
Don't you mean photographic?
No.
god, you should never be in the FBI. you'd give away america's secrets to any boy who asked.
She asked how far humans have gone into a volcano because they did in spy kids. She was serious.
fuck you guys, stop putting fake babies in my car the cops came again.
she's telling me all about the love triangles of her sims. you tell me how it's going.
At my wifes high school reunion. Found out her nickname was 'Back Door Brooke'. EVERYONE is calling her that.
My only regret is that we didn't pee on our neighbors Prius
My mom now keeps ice cubes on hand for my bong water. We may be able to work this relationship out.
I vote for a trading skills night. You teach me to juggle, I'll teach you knife fighting, and we'll both learn banjo
I don't know but this 12 year old kid is soaking up all of our bad morals like a super tampon on the second day of my period
You threw up on his face 22 hours ago and now he's here holding your hand. I think he likes you.
Remember when I made out with that stranger at the bar on my 21 in chicago? I wonder how he's doing
I think he may actually care that I call him slampiece instead of his real name. Who knew he had feelings?
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