i don't have fun when you have fun. i have embarrassment, fear, and significantly less cash in my wallet.
He has some good qualities. Beneath the layers of asshole and fat.
i have to start hiding my credit card when i drink i woke up this morning with 4 emails from Farmville telling me i spent over $800 on coins last night
Hannah Montana > iCarly
I'm disregarding that text and your testicles entirely
You said that we had to leave the party together and proceeded to repeat the "ducks fly together" speech from The Mighty Ducks word for word. Soon the whole party was quite and started chanting quack..quack...quack..
When I was in the bathroom and wiped with a paper towel I found in the trashcan, I realized that this might be the reason I have a yeast infection.
laying on floor next to bathroom with vent on to give myself comfort and remind me that im not going deaf. what did i smoke?
Totally forgot Mike has only one ball. Is it sad I'm excited to see it? Or shall I say the lack of it?
Damn you and your marathon penis with its superhuman capabilities
There is a BIG difference between doing coke and getting peed on and getting peed on FOR coke
i'm not saying you're gay. i'm just saying all my gay friends think you have a great ass.
I just realized I haven't got laid since the last time the Browns won.
Haha, how do I word that nicely? "You got me to the edge of no return twice and failed to let me orgasm, therefore you owe me chicken nuggets or hot wings. Your decision"
Had sex on your trumpet just an fyi.
a reward? ill think of something
if its not drugs or food I swear to god ill throw a fit
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