somehow in between the body shots the bong hits and trying to convince the 7-11 lady to let me fill up my vodka bottle with cherry slurpee. i misplaced my car.
hahhahahha. mid doggie-style, i faked an asthma attack. the sex was that bad
jersey shore has given me a vivid depiction of what things will be like for me once i get to hell
i dont think the girl sending me nudes is qualified to pass judgement on me
Nothing sez sunday morning like waking up in a phonebooth with a leg cramp.
Does hooking up with the gay pledge count as hazing?
there is a money trail leading from my bathroom to my living room.. the trail ends with a half eaten bag of chips with a note that says "magical chipz".. who am i?
It was awkward at first he now knows I fucked his little brother, they were both there. then the tequila kicked in and everything was fine.
I just can't even fathom the crazy and I work at a mental hospital.
No, dude...I agree it's great in theory but I promise you that 80 drunk 21 year old sorority girls together in one room for formal is one of the worst drama filled ideas ever. Ever.
I just remembered I made you punch yourself in the face last night and I would like to formally apologize for that even though it was hilarious.
Like when I see him I look straight through his appearance and just envision a big walking penis.
He yanked my breathe right strip off in the middle of me riding him.
my dad just built a flame thrower.. you should probably get here
yea i'll help you find a man. but, when I say jump, you say on who.
Randomize
