I woke up fully clothed on top of my sheets and i didnt even pee myself..so proud.
question: from what angle do you give a hand job. im confused..
I think god was stupid personally. The clit should be inside the vagina. Idiot.
I just remembered we said the Lord's Prayer before we went out last night.
Meh. I'll learn enough German to ask her for a handjob, then I'm out
You never cease to amaze me.
You dont understand. she was my french AND spanish teacher. that's 2 kinds of freaky. i have to find her on facebook.
He blended the pizza with water and drank the whole thing. He is my hangover hero
I was wondering, is there any way to hook up a lawn hose to a keg?
I just went to add a song I had never heard before to my "high as fuck" playlist and it was already there.
It would have been nice to break the dry spell with nice, civilized, sober sex somewhere other than on my friend's couch.
Deciding whether to take my sex toys home for Christmas will be the biggest decision I make this holiday season
There is a check pinned to the wall at Connor's. It's a check I wrote for $1,000,000... To you. Clearly you made out well on St. Patrick's day. Thanks for being too shitfaced to remember to grab that.
I don't particularly remember setting a firecracker off in my hand. No more tequila.
All I could think about was how many vaginas had been on the toliet that I was pukin in
So, I just found out Ireland, is #1 in binge drinking. I know its Sunday but this one is for America.
Randomize
