Let's just say there is a bloody hand print above my bed and it's not mine. Literally.
I can't believe the cop was so cool about the whole thing, I mean, I had man mayo all over my jeans.
I'm actually pretty neutral about a lot of things. I'm like Switzerland with a penis.
koolaid chicken. i marinated it for 2 hours and roasted it on a rock in a fire. it was bright blue and raw. but that shit was tasty
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He said he only likes girls with a sense of humor, after he took his pants off I understood why
You paid at the door and they gave you a straw for the kiddie pool full of booze.
After a bit there were two girls who got naked and liquor wrestled. I don't think it was planned.
Not sure how ur night is going, but unless u also saw a naked drunk chick pissing outside i doubt it can top mine
But how will the next generation learn about life choices without a Jersery Shore?
He's on the bus now and took off his Amish hat so just his long ginger beard is present. Goodbye, majestic Amish ginger. Go forth and represent your minority well.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
woke up to a case of keystone on my porch when I went to bed at seven that morning.. I think it's someone's peace offering for getting my roommates car towed
Currently tripping balls and watching Pink Floyd the wall and I'm crying during it. If this isn't a self realization then I don't know what to tell you.
New rule. If he's too busy to put the "H" in "what" then I'm too busy to put his D in me.
I woke up naked and alone this morning. What a life
But I’m still curious to know... how did the homemade porno go?
cant one of your roommates drive you?
You came in my eye once. You owe me.
ill be there in 20
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