Can a clitoris grow tomatoes? Its symbolic and rhetorical.
Con: they had to cauterize my wound twice. Pro: The docs agreed I'll be able to get really drunk tonight since I've lost so much blood.
sound pretty economical
I have no idea how to attract men with my personality anymore. He can't see my tits via facebook chat
5 out of the 6 of them cut their hands while trying to shot gun the beer, I had never seen balls attached to such patheticness
I really shouldn't have to apologize. It was your own damn fault for opening a tab at the bar and telling me about it.
She wasnt impressed wen i brought a guy for her back with me, a 3am impromptu sperm donor is not a gd birthday present. Im a bad gf.
He just showed me how to break a chop stick with his ass.
I'm going to try to ignore the homoerotic subtext in that last question...
I have decided that today will be all about indulgence and hedonism.
Just smoked a joint with the hottest patient. God I love night shifts.
You're about wine.
Yes, I'm like 90% wine at the moment
I just ordered cookies for delivery. My life is falling apart.
We knew it was an interesting night when we found my thong wrapped around a chocolate chip muffin in the fridge.
Girl i am always here for you. But i am going to have sex now so im going to call you in the morning.
Sooooo have your ex-girl console you over your ex ex girl that you destroyed said ex-girl over the possibility of
Randomize
