didnt we say no more talking to eachother
it will help you get over me i promise
im horny
ok i will unlock the door
Houston.. we have a drinking problem..
Well regardless of which drugs we choose to do tonight until four in the morning, we are having a wii bowling championship. So choose carefully.
Do you ever feel like a plastic bag?!
I dont think I should be allowed to pick my own boyfriends anymore
She literally just changed his birthday. Overly attached girlfriend has nothing on her.
i am laugh crying so hard the guy next door stopped playing guitar
I brought ur friend Scotty home... He started rubbing my crotch then fell down and passed out in front of the microwave
We were in his kitchen and she turned to me with a straight face and an avocado in her hand and said "Can we steal this?"
He said we were over, wrote my name on the condom he left in my car last night and said he'd always keep it in case I came back. It was kind of romantic
...and that is the first time I've ever wished fewer naked women on someone I like.
I achieved the level of drunk I wanted even with the length of dress I was in..
Eh. Fuck him. He's missing out. I'm legit naked and drinking straight from the bottle of wine.
It was a blind-side dick pic.
duddde i wasn't even home last night and someone elses clothes are on my floor and there glow sticks everywhere?!
Randomize
