I kissed a girl and did not like it. Now I hate Katy Perry even more.
If you want her to think you're a true humanitarian, you may want to stop referring to Hands Across America as "the Ghostbusters 2 of fund raisers."
Sweater Vest, Chin Strap, Beard, sporting a white Beret- Please don't ever let me be THAT guy.
i called him pencil dick in front of over half of his fraternity brothers...
...never gotten so many high fives in my life! fuck ya i win!
Just sit in your kitchen floor until something speaks to you.
I doubt were getting our security deposit back... the toilet just fell off the wall
I hope my tampon is in his bed. That'll teach him. Happy new years btw
Ummm Im the uneducated alcoholic of the group... if I say its a bad idea, its probably a bad idea.
He sent me a picture; erect penis, cat in hand and no pants on. He got a boob pic for that one.
Why is there a video on my phone of us trying to snort a line of Reeces Pieces with you chanting "This is how fat girls party"?
pretty sure the dicks i sucked were punishment enough
Haha yeah my head's fine..sorry about the dent in your fridge.
I have tan lines from my nipple rings.
Pretty sure when I woke up the next morning we were still fucking. It just didn't stop.
I am all the way hung over and want nothing more in this world than a McMuffin. Happy day after Thanksgiving.
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