you traded sex for a burrito?
strike ten. I need to stop drinkng
you drank a bottle of vodka and then while throwing up in my toilet you kept reminding me our hs reunion was in 2 yrs and it was time to start getting thin again anyway
I was talking to this girl who was in love with the air force. I was doing decently until I mentioned that the navy actually has more planes. Cockblocked by my knowledge of random trivia again.
still drunk. talking shit to the doc drawing my blood. this has no upside
She broke both of her ankles trying to jump off the balcony. it's like every time she drinks she makes even more impressively bad decisions than the last time
We got a 5L jug of wine for 3 Euro. Italy was a good choice.
Just found bud in my hair....gotta love curls
Robert just walked in drunk, grabbed my Jameson from me, told me to let him do his thing, and spilled it all over the coffee table. Then he told me to grab a funnel because he was going home.
I need vodka and champagne for my new favorite drink, vodkapagne. Alternative spellings are "vodkapain" and "vom-machine"
i was trying to figure out what "tidy fucking" was when i realized he meant "titty fucking" and i need to start banging smarter people....
he never texted me back from last night. i think brining out the suction cup dildo was a mistake
So stoned that I pressed the unlock button on my car keys to walk into my bedroom...
Fortunatly we found him, he was on my roof. Unfortunatly, we can't say the same for his pants. Still looking. BRB.
dude i told her that I loved her...and she said, " go fuck yourself"
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