weddingsv make me drug and hornr
My professor really needs to stop abbreviating. I'll never remember what "Fun. Anal. Trade-offs?" means when i study.
I was so hungover that I had to stop in the middle of the game and throw up. The fans cheered.
I don't remember anything other than how good it felt when I peed my pants.
when she was 9 she got kicked out of our 4-H camp dance for pole dancing on the spirit stick
Even my psychiatrist thinks I should fuck the married guy.
shes 19, drunk and said she has no gag reflex. im trying to decide if i have scruples
you dont
i dont
and being hungover still at 4 in the afternoon is NOT "having allergies"
All I vaguely remember from last night is getting up on that nice mahogany table and debating about squirrel's rights
You're more than welcome to join us! There's red velvet cake and apparently my pants are open for business I didn't consent to this
He was Jesus for Halloween and I definitely got on my knees and gave him praise.
he's not even weird he's been offering me different drinks all night
oh i remember now hes the guy that liked when i peed on him
honestly, you deserve someone taller anyways
You took a bite of the snack wrap put it down and fell asleep and when you woke up ten minutes later you asked how it got there, dipped it in soda ate it and fell back asleep.
Bad part of last night: I puked in my hair. Good part of last night: I assembled a posse.
You kept pulling me aside saying "look what I found"
Randomize
