I kind of wish I was already fat. So I could eat all I want and not worry about getting fat. Cause I'd already be at that point.
Yes, I am watching The Hills Have Thighs. And yes it is a porno remake of The Hills Have Eyes. And, again, yes, lesbian sex in the desert. Get the sand out.
The nurse told me they're using the same medicine that killed michael jackson.
Well, if they're both my boyfriend.. Then i cheated on both of them.
Some ambulance just rolled up to this bar and this girl just hops out of the back and walks inside
his extensive knowledge of the age of consent laws kinda scares me....
I really need to find a new way to reward you other than head scratches, nutella and blowjobs.
IF SOMEONE ASKS YOU IF YOU WANT THE GOOD DRUGS YOU SAY YES.
I found the hair cut I want on the girl in the porno I'm watching. now really sure how to show my stylist.
I feel as if the hash cupcakes on top of mushroom chocolates was a little excessive last night
Well we went from the roof to the stairwell to an air mattres. One day were going to fuck in a bed
The first thing we did this morning was see if we could see her barf in the prking lot from the roof. We could. It was in 5 spaces.
My ex's new girlfriends ex boyfriend is getting me my nipples pierced for Valentine's Day so who's the real winner here
It's ok, it's locked within patented Sealrite technology. That puke is staying fresh
Its that time in the evening when I've had a few cocktails and wish you'd make a video about the packers and Jack Daniels.
Randomize
