he farted when he came. not the best ending to my day.
So you know that marine I slept with, well his girlfriend just told me I was pretty, I almost feel bad for sleeping with him now...
Dont! You were just serving you country
i was trying to give him roadhead and my tits kept knocking his cheap shifter into neutral...was the first time my tits have ever cock blocked me
Yea, i was tied up and blindfolded. And someone was throwing chicken nuggets at my face.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Don't ever tell me I'm a bad friend. I woke up at 7 this morning to drive your mistake home because you wouldn't get up.
He's a waiter, looks 15, and told me he loved me after only talking to me for 30 minutes. I told him I wanted a margarita. We got 3 free pitchers. I may have to make this our regular Wednesday night hangout.
But apparently I got kicked in the head by a stripper at some point
Going through my purse trying to find money for this cab but all I keep pulling out if chicken from my burrito o ate an hour ago. Help?
Fuck you for setting me up with the guy from the Nickelback cover band
Payback for not stopping me from fucking the guy in the wookie costume
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I moved my bed to the living room so when a girl walks in she has to decide right away if shes in or out
How do I tell your little brother I lost my virginity wearing nothing but his socks?
Formal letter or email.
I will kick you in all of your body parts. All at once.
I can't go to class, I have all this weed to sell
COCAINE AND SUSPENSFUL BBC SHOWS DO NOT WORK.
Idk. The bad part of me thinks it's a good idea. The bad part is also the stupid part.
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