He just washed his hands with scrubbing bubbles yelling "They work hard so I don't have to!"
I just had one of those moments where i was really sad that i'll never get to be asian.
Sonogram pictures belong on a fucking fridge...NOT FACEBOOK!!
I envy the lives of milf's kids, the little kid grabs her tits and she just laughs and says not now
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If people don't want my drunken phone call then TAKE YOUR FUCKING NUMER OFF OF FACEBOOK, like it's just that easy...
I'd rather just be alone, than deal with this bullshit. I just want to be alone. Cats and vibrators never let you down.
I just entered us to win a trip to Vegas for spring break. GET YOUR VAGINA READY FOR THE ULTIMATE DICK HUNT!
He passed out in the car on the way to the party. Seabiscuit tripped before the race even started....Lil bitch....
Want to go swimsuit shopping? First one who cries buys ice cream.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
we got kicked out of the bar last night for sneaking into the back kitchen and eating handfulls of cheese in the walk in fridge
My move is emasculating men with my superior intellect and it's not as charming when they can't see my huge rack.
I'm literally in the bathroom for two minutes and I walk out to a random dude with his face in your tits
My vagina is very pro this idea
So I heard her yell at him and I went downstairs to find he had lit up each one of my smokes and taken just one drag off each and had em lined up on the table. She says he "experiments" when on Ambien.
I just shaved my legs via the sink as to not wake my parents up because I know I'll be having marathon sex tomorrow after my certification exam... so this is life after college.
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