GM filed for bankruptcy, all the dealerships closed, and it's june and I'm in jeans and a sweatshirt and I'm cold. What is the point of living in this state anymore?
so i realized that everyone figured out i was a slut before i did. then i realized that no one felt like telling me. sometimes i think you just keep me around for entertainment.
you're right.
I wanna be on tlc
Impossible. You are neither fat, fertile or fashionless.
Oh. Im drinking alone in a banana costume. Every time youre feeling down, i want you to think of me right now and know that your life is better than mine.
It's like split custody, only he's not a kid and they have sex with him.
I woke up with no pants, someone elses shirt, but my new years crown still on. That is dedication.
where are you guys? the police just woke me up on the couch outside.
He just told an 8 year old to go fuck himself so we probably won't be in the butterfly exhibit much longer.
Had sex with him again...yikes. and the whole time he kept saying "i wish we could do this forever." Forever lasted about 45 seconds
Just considered playing a drinking game with powerade with my sister so she would get some fluids in her. I do so well with sick people.
Last night she walked off and disappeared from everyone got home at 330 and said she went to the casino with her cab driver.
As I took my shirt off he commented on how great my boobs where. I responded with "thanks, I grew them myself"
Considering I drank for you last night, do you mind picking up your half of the hangover
We're pretty sure we got naked at Pride, so running the two blocks to your place in my underwear is a step up the dignity ladder really.
I just got out of a $280 speeding ticket by acting like The Big Lebowski. Seriously Jeff Bridges is the man.
Randomize
