omg kevin jonas gave his bride a glass slipper..could he be any gayer then he is now
he is so gay. he makes clay aiken look straight. what is wrong with the lady that married him? kevin must be envious of her balls
At what point should shame kick in? Realising I had a one night stand with a man engaged or realising I am that man's wedding photographer?
So my retainer doesn't fit, so i'm getting drunk so i can put it back in. Alone.
You would...
I guess you don't remember pouring tequila in the dog bowl and slurping it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
obviously you don't know the college version of myself. if there's something i'm ALWAYS willing to put up for it's alcohol.
My relaxing drive may end up as a surprise bootycall in Pittsburgh. Don't try to stop me.
that wasn't rum that I poured down your throat while you were sleeping
No, you always delete them without reading. Enjoy the virtue of morning innocence. What are you doing today.
They have chocolate covered tequila candy at work. This is not a drill. May be drunk by noon.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I found a pair a guys underwear in my purse that has a British flag on it and says and I quote "British beef" what.the.fuck.
How hard is it to grasp the concept of 'I lost an impromptu saber bout and so I have to make a macaroni map of Soviet Russi, including Kazicstan'!?
You partied and then got cock slapped, Don't tell me you didn't have fun
Fuck you, dude, I'm not sharing my weed anymore if you're going for the Panthers.
I fucked a marine... I told him it was like personal revenge and he said he could live with that and that he didn't mind being used.
ill drive you to the airport today if we can have sex first
i left yesterday
ill pick you up from the airport on sunday if we can have sex after
Randomize