i wonder if i could find a boyfriend who would call me big papa
sure if you go to prison
My scrabble letters just formed failure. Thanks God.
Do you think most people who work at an airport Chili's can pin point where their lives went wrong?
bitch got booty called while we were making out. and then she actually left.
Still had my bottle opener ring on. Started to give him a hand job. LOL
If you were wondering whether I accidentally FaceTime called the undergrad who works for me in lab during a particularly graphic blow job last night, then the answer is yes.
I'm hungover and surrounded by children and Republicans. What did I do to deserve this?
He doesn't care. He wouldn't care if my vag grew arms and smacked him in the face.
you haven't really lived until you are in a situation where your vagina is hanging out
Never thought going to McDonald's alone at 3 AM would end with a blowjob outside some random girl's apartment...
Normally, it will inspire me to work. Today, it's inspiring me to masturbate.
I have chicken nuggets, lube and brand new batteries, he can stay at work charting all weekend for all I care, I'm set.
Now all I have unanswered questions and a fucked up finger
The last thing I need is a possessed urethra.
Stories. There's stories.
MEGHAN YOU'VE BEEN THERE FOR 20 MINUTES
Randomize
