You screamed 'pound me, you big thick stud.' I looked around for porn cameras.
Shut up. I did not.
I really wish I was making that up.
i just won an entire level on word mole with the word 'clitoris'
I just saw someone marching around outside wearing only a loincloth, dragging a fuckton of sheet metal. Spring has Sprung.
We started playin just the tip, then shit got crazy
The last thing I remember was talking about the economic viability of cock ring manufacturing... we had some good ideas
I feel choking has become trendy-- ita losing its effect. I may just have to go back to missionary to spice it up
Yea dude. I'm gonna be the life of the party. THIS BITCH GETS DRUNK BY HERSELF
Megan brought her friend up last night, greeted her by drunkedly taking a piss all over her duffle bag of clothing
The woman that sang I Touch Myself died today. There's only one appropriate way to honor her memory.
I'm on the job.
I really wanna just be like, can you just eat me out and stop whining
I think that would solve a million problems
I did my patriotic duty. I woke up next to a veteran this morning.
Oh Jesus our whore days are numbered
I woke up with my my shoes on and pants half way off and missing 60 dollars. Please please please tell me you saw me last night.
I will literally have glitter in my crotch for weeks.
He's the one named Andrew. In his profile picture he is the one on the right in the monkey costume.
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