you kept typing in answers.com, why are the state police calling my house, expecting an answer
ugh the "ive seen you naked on the internet" look is really getting tiring
Okay I've seen like three girls walking around crying today. Weird?
everyone's regretting their thursdays.
I listened to the last 10 minutes of that 20 minute voicemail, it's solid gold. At one point he literally suggests we buy tasers and go around shooting people.
Woke up this morning in a randoms bed clutching an airplane ticket. God I hope I'm still in the country
Do what your heart wants. . .
My heart wants to rip his balls off and tie therm to his head using his penis
We haven't said piping hot jizz in awhile... that needs to come back into our conversations
That's the point dumbass, I can't use my boss as a reference cause they'd have to fucking call him in prison.
His dick looks just like him, taller than average, thick, and somehow always angry.
I either have a razor blade lodged in my throat or I've been drinking entirely too much Evan Williams.
On the food pyramid big dick are "sometimes foods"
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but a penn state hat. We are....
So, I'm a little drunk in Seattle with Glenna, but we've all agreed that it's patriotic to think about Bill Clinton from time to time during sex. 'Merica
I'm at the gym. I've taken enough caffeine to feel inspired to be a low budget instagram fitness model. I totally forgot my push up bra though
You should of known that i was high if i refer to myself as melting into anything
Randomize
