where are my pants?
you were passing out with two blankets and the person next to you was cold so you gave him your pants to keep warm
areolas are like halos for boobs.
Just witnessed a circumcision at clinical. i suddenly feel a sense of reconciliation over every guy who's done me dirty...
My mom and I are having a "yay I don't have herpes" shopping trip day
I said we should get a taxi and you were waving down cars, three of which were cops and one of them slowed down and shook his head then kept driving
He didn't think we needed a taxi
Their engagement party consisted of them doing shots, yelling at each other, leaving for 30 minutes, and coming back with smiles.
I'd say they're off to a great start!
Like for real, is your junk ok? I have to look after my investments.
I felt like in order for him to make it to mordor and destroy the ring, he'd have to make sweet sweet love to me in some form of hut or cave.
Yes... I'll kill two birds with one crazy ecstacy filled night.
if the furniture in my bedroom wasn't shape shifting... this would be a different story.
My boobs are literally freaking out because I've been wearing a bra for more than three hours....I need to go out more...
Never in a million years thought I would have to put jello shot recipe/equation into an excel spreadsheet
Hey can you send me a pic of your breast with a peace sign in the photo? I'm trying to win a scavenger hunt contest. Thanks so much
at the hospital. Kevin drank straight from the river
I'm going to start talking to Bill again, he has friends with boats which means we'll get to go on boats.
Randomize
