You can spell. I can kill people with no remorse. We all have our skills.
dude, that girl smelled worse than the great depression.
I am now the proud owner of a 10-12 year old's Optimus Prime costume from Walmart. Tomorrow is going to be a good day.
someone should tell her that easter eggs aren't meant to be dildos.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Please don't let me drink ever again. I apparently told him he could stay but as there was no room in the bed he'd have to lie on top of me and he'd need to anchor himself on with his penis so he didn't fall off.
So my bf wanted to cum on my face and I let him. Afterwards I wiped some off, wiped it across his forehead and said, "The king has returned".
He put his hand in my cleavage. NOT ON. IN. BETWEEN. NO more gingers
When my parents ask if I met any nice guys in California, I'm going to answer, "No, but I have gone home with alot of nice girls". Too much, too soon?
There are both cum and chocolate stains on my sheets. Can't decide whether this is a new low or a new high.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's 5'2" and his dick 4'8"
This feels more like a conference of all the people I've fucked in the past year.
Definitely ended up doing Coke with Chewbacca in the porta potty behind the haunted house.
why is there a shopping cart in my back seat? and a dick drawn on the side of my car?
Van sex tonight? No need to tell me how classy that sounded.
Reminder to self: never have sex on a trampoline. Trampoline burn hurts worse than carpet burn.
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