I met a girl last nite that charged by the inch. i didnt have enough money but i figured shed be a good deal for u
Locked eyes w/ her at mainstreet, and said 'yeah yeah get it!' From there we started violently making out on the dancefloor (I had a FULL boner, ps) and then I got her number
If I remember correctly, I may have been smoking a cigarette on the dance floor. This is the true sign of a douchebag in his native habitat...fmylife
i think i would be more confident if i were chinese.
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On a side note, I now know what a $150 cab ride looks like
he came within less than a minute of me blowing him. this was our second night hanging out in a row. for an almost 30 year old italian man, he is NOT living up to his country's reputation
Held my professor's hair back while she was puking. I'd better get an A out of this or else the pics are going on Facebook.
I just celebrated my ex boyfriends birthday by having more sex than he will today.
I was mixing candy canes and coors light and was in a great place.
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the cab driver said that we weren't the worst shit show he'd ever seen, CHALLENGE ACCEPTED!!
I cancelled the entertainment for your b-day party.... Keep the bouncy castle just in case.
He's practically not my boyfriend anymore. So let's go get some glitter, balloons, alcohol and forget this night ever happened.
The compounded multi day delayed hangover hit me hard today, with a vengeance normally reserved for large objects that go in my ass. I don't feel good.
Hurry up I'm getting mooned by a hobo
How do u explain to your grandma that your relationship status is hooking up with randoms at a bar
Randomize