I think I saw a glimmer of recognition, but she must not have been able to make me out through all of her whorishness.
Best news ive heard all week. The cougars r coming! The cougars are coming!
I just won Halloween Walk of Shame Bingo!
THE PICTURE OF PEPPERMINT MOCHA MADE ME WANT TO TOUCH MYSELF
just took my temp. 103. i wonder how tylenol and jager bombs are gonna mix
I feel like he knows I had a dream about him eating me out in the janitors closet at the holiday party. He's giving me THAT look.
they fed me a peach. i was laying on the floor telling them how beautiful they were
I know it's not technically the "Mile High Club" but we def need a name for the airport bathroom. Cuz that just happened.
That boy needs some memories to take back home with him
Also my vagina isn't a crater of death where nothing comes out
AFTER I licked the bald guys head they told me we weren't playing
Is it acceptable to have my intern get me pedialite and plan b?
It's a learning experience. She can add to her resume that she cured her bosses hangover and poor decisions
The only thing I know is that these arent my shoes and Aaron is missing and he has my house keys.
I finally broke my dry spell. I did it. D-do-da-Dora.
Nothing kills the mood like opening another guy’s dick pic in bed
Randomize
