i was like the pretty and slutty 8th grade girl who goes to a party, gets wasted, and ends up having sex with a senoir
details?
alcohol + bed + penis = sex
This is the kind of period I feel I should name out of respect to the fact I might have just gotten lucky this time.....
Still drunk just puked in the meat cooler tried to clean it up with ham. Its not working
I'm having a self conscious moment and I need your complete honest opinion of my boobs.
No more drinking with Em. She was on the ground so much she looked like she belongs in a lifealert commercial
Can I write your parents a thank-you note for your huge dick?
He sent me a pic of her engagement ring and then STILL asked for nudes.
I cried over the lack of milkshakes I've consumed in the last month
I just sneezed glitter I JUST SNEEZED G LITTER I j u st SneeZED GLIT TER I DO NOT HAVE TIME FOR THIS AT ALL.
I'm finally in my bed, my pants are off, and there's no pee on my carpet this is the best life has been all day
That moment when a stripper is the one that makes the two of you have to define the status of your relationship...
I'm just the girl with the breathalyzer keychain, and I embrace that.
Dude, no, you tried to sleep on the stove. I mean. You were pissed when I stopped you... but I couldn't have you catching on fire in my house.
I'm not going to drink anymore, and on that note I'm not going to drink any less either, so I'll see you there. . .
Mike's letting gay guys do body shots off him again.
My boyfriend, ladies and gentlemen.
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