she's in the bathroom throwing up right now...what is the hookup protocol after she is done? what all can I do with her?
Considering last night's endeavors, I am going to hell 5 times over. 1 for puking on a hobo, 1 for laughing about it, and 3 for remembering it today and laughing about it sober
The guy at McDonald's just told us there is no flash photography allowed.
all adderall does is make me the grand champion of using wikipedia.
ironically, his detergent was also "small and mighty"
I managed to lose everything but my socks.. which stayed on all 6 times we had sex.
She said, "awww, you're so sweet" after I started putting on a condom. How many STDs have I just contracted?
He wants to hookup..at the fair..this is our chance to leave him stranded with no clothes.
Imagine cans of beer raining. Like not hitting you and hurting you. Just gently falling into your hand whenever you're sad
he told me "apparently my gag reflex doesn't work so if you magically grew a penis I would deep throat you"
I stared at him for a solid five minutes because he looked like what I imagine god would look like if god was a lumberjack
It's always great when the guy I get pills from sends me an email that says "I know you will get clean it's going to be hard but I know you can do it"
Could you just like have a friend who feels bad for me and secretly always wanted to have sex with me
Also I've accepted I am not going to be a catch today. I look like a dead hooker and the remedial work is going to be patchy at best with the shakes I've got.
I'm fucking camped out by the bathrooms. I think the poopatrator is in there. Wtf is my life
Almost an end to the saga.
Randomize