we're at the bar and some girl dropped a bottle of burnettes strawberry vodka out of her purse and it broke.
i mean, if that's not class, then i don't know what is
Ben's a prick.
What Ben are you talking about?
All the bens across all the lands
I'm not ready for the Pike bikes to move back in to town it was wonderful seeing that sorority house empty all summer
... I'm KD
I shall celebrate this moment with a beer conveniently located in the sock drawer directly to the right of me.
Literally 6000 elephants in my backyard.
Haha im sorry. Its just financially responsiable to bang him instead of you right now.
I just woke up wearing the O-ring from my dildo harness as a bracelet. Classy.
EVERYONE CAN HEAR YOU FUCKING YOU ARE IN A TENT
He made me hold his dick and say "I solemnly swear that I'm up to no good"
The sorority chicks were the Persian army, and we were their 300 Spartans. Can barely stand up now...such a good ratio
im like basted in vodka, i went tanning and it was like i was an alcoholic turkey being cooked in a locker of doom
All I see when I think of you are dancing penis angels around your head.
Ok. As long as I can keep Kevin contained to the room I'll be ok. If not u might have a naked puking Kevin at ur door
Please remind me tomorrow that I ate a loaf of jimmy johns bread on the toilet 5 mins ago
Omg. I just remembered my underwear is in my wallet
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