yeah but it's new years. they should arrest people for being sober that day.
she said, "is it ok if I touch it?" that's when I knew I was in trouble... I knew she was a virgin but seriously..
I REALLY appreciate you guys taking care of me when im wasted but i think its weird when i wake up in different clothes than black out in
we couldn't afford a big pool so we bought 2 kiddie pools and put the inflatable beer pong table inbetween. get over here. now.
I was just on craigslist and saw and ad for a naked yoga instructor. I will no longer be jobless.
They just both started mumbling "i cant go home like this" "it's all over my face" "do you have extra pants?"
Paying 5 grand for boobs is saving me like 10 grand in weed
Apparently, his doctor was impressed with how well we took care of his leg. We're like the kings of naked triage.
So how many licks to the face does it take to get kicked out of the bar?
I'm at a nursing home getting weed. Lol when times are tough, things tend to get a lil weird
Currently hiding in the shower from the RA and my elbow turns it on. Showers and Ciroc don't mix..
You having your own car has severely reduced the amount of blowjobs I get.
Just bought plan b at 8am. Then the cashier asked if I wanted to donate to the children's miracle network. Fml
Annoying and petty is the name of the game and I'm the MVP.
He told me he would make me come so hard I would throw up. I'm actually horrified that he thinks that's something any person would want
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