How did you get the entire couch up on it's side and into the bathroom?
Its not college unless your study breaks were to go throw up from blacking out the night before
He's high as balls tripping balls and doing a reenactment of the scene where Buzz jumps off the balcony and can't fly to his soundtrack of Toy Story.
Home safe. Took me everything not to stop and pick up some random cat that looked like an ocelot tho.
I attempted to stand up and was quickly reminded by gravity that I am the universe's bitch right now
Just so you know, your wedding is in the same place I gave my first bj.
But I did spend part of my morning scrubbing your cum off my grandmothers piano.
Signs you do Molly too much. Glow sticks fallout of random articles of clothing on academic row
Fantasizing about the apocalypse is fun and shit until the conditions that could lead to one suddenly seem feasible
I passed up getting laid last night. It's almost been a YEAR - what the Hell was I thinking, being so choosy??
i just watched a 27 minute video about owls...that high.
Your dad was just slow dancing with the priest and holding a beer. Classic
the only fun thing to do here is drink beer and make mistakes. i feel like im in college again
Irony: drinking your pre workout supplement out of the cup your Krispy Kreme doughnut holes came in.
Thanks for driving us home last night. Also, blanket apology for anything I may have said/done. I blacked out sometime near the t-shirt cape incident
Randomize
