My hot female boss's cubical is right next to mine with a wall between us. Do you think it is too forward to make a glory hole in the wall?
How do I say "sorry I gave you and your sister herpes" in German?
found some acid from a couple months ago while looking through christmas lights. Looks like santa came early this year.
I'm pretty sure I just woke up to one of the airport janitors saying that she wanted to tie me up and do something.. I couldn't hear what, thank god
Also when they left they could only find one sock between the two of them. Apparently we're like crazy sock ripping vixens when we bring guys home drunk
I just made my roommate a 'Hope you don't have chlamydia' cake.
Make one for john too.
Dude he fell into my wall and left an imprint then decided to have sex with the door open. Vents carry noise pretty well
Do you think you're physically and mentally capable of killing me? Because I'd really appreciate it.
You won't wear your Santa suit, I can't get trashed, and you won't use handcuffs! This is the worst Christmas EVER.
I'm pretty sure the guy in front of me at Walmart doesn't have good plans. It's one am he is buying a flash light and black bandanna
I raged so hard that I was so hungover today I threw up out of a car window going 50mph cause my parents didn't pull over quick enough ...sorry to the people behind us
And that was the night we had mind-blowing sex with the score from Raiders of the Lost Ark blaring on vinyl in the background...
Nobody wants to date "Eats Taco Bell Secretly In Her Car" Girl
It's brunch. If you find dick at brunch. You an A+ hoe.
He's petting your head, we need to leave now.
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