Should I have kids to fix a relationship??
Dude ur right that IS what a vagina looks like!
Do everybody a favor and GET LAID MORE.
He managed to light the Jello on fire...
she definitely blew him on the riverbank, some lady floated past and said "have some pride honey", amazingly awkward
I just need to go to a bar tonight wrapped in an American flag singing the national anthem
Dude she only counts as your gf if you're home. We both signed the fair game contract when we became roommate. So are you really going to be mad or come eat a waffle with us?
She said we could only have sex if she got to keep her fake moustache on during
Im coming down to miami this weekend
We shall drink from the everclear river
His balls are like really small, like dog sized balls. It was a weird discovery. Ever done a guy with dog sized balls?
She got called into work early but she left me a note that had directions to her roommates stash of weed on top of a two bacon and egg mcmuffins. I think I win.
he taught all the little kids to ski. it was stupid hot. i'm pretty sure my ovaries exploded.
If he doesn't give you the same feelings you get when the pizza guy arrives, he's probably not worth it.
I mean, I would have, but I couldn't come up with a logical reason to bring up oral sex during an orientation.
Let's just say his oral game was lacking. Hell, lacking is too nice of a word to describe it.
also i don't know what you guys ate last night but he broke the toilet
Randomize
