I'm not really sure actually. until I fell in love with a boy (which was just a few weeks ago) I thought my attraction to men was purely physical.
so you were gay...and then you realized you were EVEN MORE gay
proudest moment: just made a guy walk into a parked car with his mouth hanging open cause of the shirt im wearing.
Alex texted me. Bootycall boy #2. its like an alarm goes off once i'm single that the line is open again
Note to self: never do anything I don't want to explain to a paramedic
It's shit like that that makes me wish being deaf was contagious
I'm hoping he'll tell everyone how great in bed I am. Well, how great in bathroom floor I am.
I just don't know what he sees in my vagina...and that scares me.
The guy at the Apple store said the warranty does NOT cover getting cum out of the keyboard. I can't believe I believed you.
Dude. I realize why I got sick. 8 shots three beers in an hour. Plus I ate an expired lunchable earlier.
I really don't think there's anything more liberating than farting.in a loud bar where no one.can.hear you
You're telling me he never had to ask for a blow job and he STILL broke up with you? I call bullshit on that one.
We might as well just set our livers out to sea on burning ships
I had a dream that I got you so wet that you flooded my apartment
That said I did get head on the roof of a 15 story building which, regardless of quality, is still cool
I think that living in the "now" is the worst fucking ghandi buddha whatever advice bc that means I'm just gonna get drunk in the now.
Randomize
