are you so shy because you have an std?
ejected that DVD during the department meeting.. it was our porn from last night. I have a new nick-name at work.
The irony of calling it Pride is that you do things that no one should be proud of.
For the record, chili cheese fritos are not a chaser.
Mass texted booty calls to all the guys I've hooked up with this year to commemorate the end of the semester.
you know, this Evan Williams whiskey isn't so bad when it's watered down a bit and you're home by yourself on a Saturday listening to Snoop Dog alone in your apartment without pants or any plans for your future...
I only blacked out one night of three if that isn't fucking personal growth idk what is
Not gonna lie I just got drunk and started doing applications because I know I'm going into work tomorrow still drunk
Is it a bad sign starting the new year off naked, wet, and alone?
Asking for a friend of course
You call it sex. I call it penis conditioning.
Stop trying to get me to choose vodka over a nap
we decided to take the jello everclear shot at the party...didnt think it tasted any different....o dear god...the regret..
He’s 48, has a Prince Albert piercing and a white Range Rover
who knew being a fake dominatrix could be so fun?
It’s so white trash that I almost have to have it.
Randomize
