i just practiced my bj skills on a banana in front of the mirror
its going to be a good night
And then I chipped his tooth because I got too into it. Helloo, single life.
you called to congratulate me on being the reason you lost never have i ever
I passed out on my porch last night. I'm still making it to class. This is what growing up means.
Hooked up with 8 guys, puked 4 times, got a few bruises, and my face is still numb... I think this visit has truly impacted my college decision
Young lesbians are the worst. And also what got me through high school, sooooo
I can't help but look at my sex life and acknowledge that this is not normal behavior.
Also I just took Ritalin with coffee so if anyone wants to know what numbers sound like, I got you
I can't sleep. My mind keeps asking "turn down for what?" but it won't accept any of my answers.
Then while I was crying on his shoulder, he got a boner. Soo. I kinda just hopped on.
I didn't tell that thing I wasn't coming over. Whoops
You know you haven't dated in a while when you call boys "that thing" and call dates "a boy type thing."
bitch dont make me pour hotsauce in your vagina
I think I'm just gonna exercise my lungs and fingers. With bong hits and crochet. BECAUSE I AM A REAPONSIBLE ADULT DAMMIT!!
she crossed my comfort zone...i thought i was a freak
said the guy with a pink sex swing...
I am no longer and illegal Moonshiner. I just made thousands of gallons of incredibly High test alcohol with police watching and waiting for thare couple of jugs so that they can bring home and disinfect their houses with it. I'm fat with money at the moment.
Randomize
