he puts the penis in happiness.
How do I put "special brownies" into Weight Watchers?
She made me cum so hard I couldn't hear for half an hour after
I was told to ask you about memoirs of a geisha.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we used the bottom of a tampon for coke since no one had a 20 on them. My life has resisted to this.
We were running down las vegas boulevard at 8:30 am with our beers cause we were late for our flight
Alright, who started the "how long till dereck gets deported from Australia" pool? I want in on that.
i showed up sober to class for the first time. my prof said that i was "off my game today". i love philosophy
I just duct taped myself into my costume. I apologize in advance if you find me in a compromised position involving duct tape and underwear when you get home tonight
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Lmao I should put that ad on Craigslist "in need of muscular and determined team of men to carry drunken birthday whore safely home"
Don't use or open the microwave. It's full of smoke. Buying a new one tomorrow, will explain.
I'm still working on figuring out my birthday blowjob schedule. I'd love to just have all three of them get in there but I get the feeling they wouldn't like that.
Oh my god I would go to planned parenthood the same day I get my nipples pierced
He carried you out but the best part is you kept saying "can't I keep dancing" as you were gushing blood
I cant wait to tell our kids we met because you subscribed to my onlyfans.
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