im over her. I got weed and youtube. everything i could ever ask for.
I just did the nutritional comparison between 2% milk and Bud Light Lime.. the beer had less calories, less carbs, and less fat. It's not looking good for milk in my life anymore
This is like a relationship, I expect to be mind blown at least once a week.
i don't know. but im upstairs in the closet with a burger i found in their fridge
i woke up and saw you were brushing his hair naked. I can never pass out around you, man.
She's just so happy...and so naked.
Well tech shes born nov 12, but since her head was out on the 11th, she claims both days as her birthday
You're a Heat fan? You lose any chance blowjob bc of your poor choice.
I'm at a gyno in Japan. Safe to say every possible rule of etiquette is about to be broken. Buckle up, motherfuckers.
man my uterus needs to drop the egg or GTFO, BUUUSHIT
Come help me clean and have sexual intercourse with me
Bring breadsticks
Shaving your balls drunk sounds like a good idea untill you do it
When Ben was deep throating pickles last night I actually reconsidered our relationship
I'm not sure if 14 year old me would be disappointed or proud that I fucked him behind her middle school??
but like who hasn’t gotten fingered at the state fair?
Randomize