Christians are straight up FREAKS
I will be home in 10 min. Dont be beating off on the couch
enter at your own risk
Asian chick on skype stripping for me. Hold on give few min
i think i would be more confident if i were chinese.
Just found out I have to work new year's eve. It's like one final 'fuck you' from 2009.
i kind of just want to tell my cleaning lady I'm an alcoholic so it's not awkward when I stumble out of my room to go sit in my car for 2 hours and wait for her to finish cleaning the several empty bottles of wine in my room
she just uttered the sweetest sentence in the english language...my stripper friends are coming over
Home. Hour long discussion with mom. Very frightened. Eating a sausage. Don't remember making it. Confused.
Do you think that we can get a group discount on liver transplants? We'll be like kids again!
I am as serious as getting herpes in Mexico...
What do herpes have to do with anything?
i also took my stockings off in the bathroom and blew my nose with them in the cab ride home. james was appalled
Sooo the theme of my 21st is rapidly becoming Gay Mexico
ur mom makes the best bacon
WHAT ARE YOU DOING IN MY HOUSE
Just had the "whores are people too" talk with Mom. Bright side it's Christmas, and I may have been drunk, I don't think she caught on.
On the bright side, only one more day until we aren't sober anymore.
Randomize
