i know ur right I'm sorry I'm stupid and incompitent look I can't even spell incompetent right! Fuck!
i just discovered how you can fold down the cardboard sleeve on a hot pocket. Life just got a whole lot easier.
Apparently the guard had to repeat "you're too drunk to get in" three times before I understood. I guess he was right.
I give him blow jobs while he watches sports.. how am I not his gf yet??
I need to move out. I just walk of shamed my way into a family breakfast party. There's no response when grandma says "where you coming from in heels at 9AM?"
i just got cockblocked by a guy drinking wine straight out of the bottle with a straw...
alcohol. turning childhood friends into awkward hookups since the dawn of civilization.
Is it obsessive that I keep picking my crazy sex rug burn scab so it leaves a scar I can remember him by?
I feel like shaving is just admitting i'm gonna do him, even though im still on the fence
shave. it'll take 10 min. Better safe than hairy.
I've thrown up twice at work. Just casually, in the mop sink. Then continued to make someone a milkshake. Want some ice cream?
I think that was him coming out to me. I just brushed it off
I learned so much about myself in that shower.
I'm not sure what is worse, the fact that Hoffman doesn't sell vodka before 9am or that I was trying to buy vodka at 8:30am.
He got a new tattoo in prison. It's actually a good tattoo, making it that much harder for me to hold out until he's off house arrest.
he brings me coffee and gets a blow job. not sure if I trained him or he trained me or it's simply mutually beneficial beautiful.
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