I bet he comes in French.
So, Southern Comfort will donate 25 cents for every bottle sold towards Gulf Coast Relief... Can we save the wetlands through my alcoholism?
The best thing he's ever done for me was comment on my profile picture saying "hello boner"
In the library. Still drunk. Shoes missnig. Term paper due in fiften minutes. Iff I puke u think theyll throw me out?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
His rich uncle has six months to live. I feel pregnant.
she wants to wait til the kids are asleep so im just shotgunning the parents beers in the pillow fort. I love fucking babysitters
You grabbed her hand and started jacking her finger off. She was horrified.
Did it finish?
His morals are debatable, but his heart or perhaps his penis is in the right place.
His penis is crooked. Right place? Maybe he starts there, but then he slants.
Waking up with a sore back because you put the team on it for jager pong all night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
ASS. GYMANSTICS. OLYMPICS. NOW!!!
It is super hard to find a good vegan dominatrix! THAT'S why I'm single
Balls deep in an Orange is the New Black marathon. Bring food and drugs.
so like what it comes down to is do I wanna look like a boss ass bitch or do I wanna masturbate.
So glad I can hide money in my wallet and drunk me is too stupid to find it. Hangover sushi ftw.
I'm literally naked with a whole pizza in my lap sitting in my chair.
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