I'm playing a drinking game with nyc prep. This will not end well for meeee
Everytime the gay dude pretends he's not gay, drink a cosmo. Everytime the crosseyed girl is crosseyed, kill her
it went kinda like vodka, childhood memories, screaming/cursing, fist fight, tears, broken shit, passing out. in that order. tis the season.
when my professor asked "does anyone know what streches across south america" and a kid in the back row said "my exgirfriends vagina" i knew i was at home.
I remember nothing of last night, but I did manage to figure out which frats I went to by the trails of straw across campus.
In honor of the internet blackout, I think everyone needs to change their Facebook pictures to ones of them being blacked out.
Watching frozen planet. There's a beach master sea lion with about 50 sea lion bitches fighting another sea lion for said bitches. It's a bloody battle. Dude. You have over 50. Share.
This drunk girl wants you to know that I do actually like you. I'm not just using you for sex. I think you're cool.
I don't know whether to call the hospital or call the prison first.
there is vomit in the pocket of my dress coat. i remember thinking "this is a weird place to puke" at some point in the evening, but i dont understand how i did this.
this one kid was speed-mumbling about putting broccoli in the printer
SHE'S PREGNANT AS SHIT, AND I JUSR PEELED A CLEMENTINE TO CHASE SHOTS WITH!! COULD LIFE GET ANY BETTER!?
And today, on Faces I'd Like to Sit On .... The starting line up of the German National Football team
Despite breaking my phone, thumb, and my dignity, last night was pretty good.
I don't know when he had the time to do it but he dug a hole in our basement like the shawshank redemption
I just saw the co founder of Waffle House passed away Friday. Are you okay?
That's about the same time my life started falling apart... Coincidence?!?!? I think NOT!!!
Randomize
