I just remembered I gave a homeless man a ride to his bridge last night.
Hey Operation Dumbo Drop... FYI, when you select your date this evening, our doorway is 3'x7'
there was a guy who was being paid to stand outside of Abercrombie without a shirt on... normally i would be okay with this but he was 40...
they hired a photographer to take a family portrait for grandmas bday gift. we just hired a male stripper. we are def the better grandkids.
I'm still not walking right. We need some boundaries for "drink-or-dare"...
Is it mean that I just sent him a pic of my tits with the header, "say bye bye?"
Where are you and who are these girls passed out on the floor?
and why are they spooning a flamingo?
they traded weed for a spot on our floor. be nice.
just used my sex toy cleaning solution to clean my reading glasses. midterms are cramping my styleeee
My hands always smell like pizza crust when im hungover.
Try eating a sub blackout with your uncle. It's not easy ok
IDK MAYBE BC I WOKE UP IN AN AIRPORT WITH A ONE WAY TICKET TO LONDON
Just try not to have a boner when you're giving your best man speech, it will really kill the vibe
He has a bear rug in his room. I'm going to ask if we can have sex on it. Wilderness sex.
I'm basically doing the Walk of Shame without the added bonus of having sex last night. That doesn't look good on anyone.
I’m looking forward to our Cougar years. These freshmen know how to fuck
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