I feel like I've been hit by a train. I woke up this morning covered in wine, free condoms, and a sign language dictionary.
i googled "the goonies drinking game." i may be alone, but i'm living the college dream.
I am drunk at a castle and it isn't even 3. Europe is amazing.
Just woke up from a dream where you lived in a gingerbread house on a snowy cliff by the sea. The dolphins were swimming away from a giant dust storm. You REALLY ought to smoke this before bed tonight.
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just remembered spooning on the cardboard and confessing to each other we had the spins.
The thumbs up barstamp on my hand is mocking my hangover with its positivity.
She kept calling herself DJ McDonalds and said she wanted to make some Egg McMusic.
If there's one thing i learned from edward 40hands is that i couldnt handle life with bottles for hands
Well, I can mark "throwing up in a daycare bathroom due to a hangover" off my bucket list.
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ETSY JUST SENT ME AN EMAIL WITH THE SUBJECT "SUMER ROMANCE" I'M BEYOND FUCKING DONE
I want to tell you your future: you're going to be having sex
my liver is dry heaving
When I finally came to, I was in the DJ booth wearing his headphones while he was spinning. That's all I got.
So hypothetically speaking.. say someone dropped their birth control pill in a hot bowl of soup, and it possibly disintegrated.. would it be just as useful?
Yeah, so if you ever try to steal it, just know my tongue's been on it in several occasions. All over it.
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