Ok so serious question: if one wanted to say the plural of mongoose, would it be mongooses or mongeese?
As of this morning, vodka still has the other side of my BFF necklace. She treats me right.
I had sex with him, and then he gave me a $5 Starbucks gift card. Totally worth it
after you threw up, you tried to prove you were sober by reading the ingredients off the shampoo bottles
Help. All alone. Room is. Changing colors. Dance party 2010, but without dancing.
Im thinking about quitting weed for my dog
Where are you? This girl fell on a baby. She is just gone. Please Hurry
I'm hurrying
Dude. She just shit herself.
Why yes actually, getting stoned and reading an AARP magazine IS totally where I wanted my night to end!
The only thought that went through my head was "that would be an absolute disaster" so of course I said yes
Water skiing blazed is the most scary thing I've ever done.
My text message history should be ashamed of itself right now.
We can't tell anyone we fucked because I'm still trying to get with your friend. Is she coming next weekend?
I don't know if it is the Everclear or chemistry, but i think my brain is coming out of my ears.
How did you end up breaking into that laundromat at 3am? I saw the snapchat but like..... How?
let me assure you that a rugburn on your forehead is the worst side effect of tequila i have experienced to date.
Randomize
