How come twittering sounds sexual?
Because of Bambi.
Dude, I don't think I'll ever be able to find a girl for me...
Is this the gay conversation?
my momz letting me make the christmas card in photoshop
so that means christmas in space?
imma make our dead cats ghosts like obi wan kenobi
peeing off your aunts pourch into the koy pond seemed like a good idea at the time
That's two mile stones in one shot. A ginger and that's my third ashley.
I'm drunk on a monday night. Not a good start to finals week
Makes Sense, i generally dont want the same person two days in a row. Its like what i pick for supper, i like variety
High me just had to pick the lock on my sisters room because I locked my vodka in there. I love vacation.
"Douchebag of the Year" award goes to the guy who didn't reply to the picture of my tits.
i fell out of the car and didnt spill my drink. come overrrr
truly a win in your book
Peeing out the car window on the way home was a nice touch. In December, in Michigan, at 3am. Never seen a girl do that before. Neither had the guy in the minivan next to us.
If blow jobs were a super power she'd be in the Justice League.
We've been watching Scooby Doo and having sex for the past 36 hours, so life is great
I don't intentionally mean to ruin relationships for personal gain but. Yeah nah I totally do.
If you're going to be single forever, you should try the quesalupas at Taco Bell.
Randomize
