I see lights
Your drunk and in times square. Time to take the 2 train home.
were you the shorter or taller girl out of you two
That's like lying to my vagina. I can't betray it like that.
Just saw a drunk guy clapping and cheering for a chipmunk climbing up a tree. Classic
Are you high right now?
is that a question or a drake reference?
Last time i was there we saw the window of the pizza place we were at get busted, we were pulled out of a taxi to be questioned by the cops, and we peed outside a waffle house. I'm in.
he signed me a blank check so today i get to decide if i want to be a saint or a millionaire
Called my ex last night, told her I wanted to bang like we use too, her fiance was in the car, I was on speaker phone. NO MORE TEQUILA!
Did she say Ok?
You know you're doing well in life when weed is considered to improve your job performance
if you guys find pieces of my teeth don't throw them out please
I have vodka and 50 pizza rolls best spring break ever
We almost ended up sober because of u!!
i feel like if we ever had babies together they would just be drunk all the time
Of course I'm watching space shows while stoned on the science channel. Why would I want to learn while not baked out of my skull?
My one night stand ended up seeing me the next morning... For my interview. Guess who got a job.
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