Eric got herpes from Jo-ann
That's what he deserves for hooking up with a french canadian
i'm at sigma nu and gary is here. what do it do?
Stay away from his face.
so i go for his dick?
Locked out of the apartment with just a box of wine way to begin the weekend.
fter the third song from an iPod commercial played I realized how much that frat sucked.
I just puked in a penis shaped cake pan. I've hit an all new low for a Tuesday.
You tried to pay the bartender in graduation checks, I think you'll be fine in the real world.
besides im still about 80% sure that im eskimo brothers with jerry springer
honestly, i just want you to have sex with him too so that you can fully understand my appreciation of his dick as well.
There where 3 half naked girls passed out on the pool table, I crawled under it and just as I was about to go to sleep some guy walks up and says: "dude nice spot" walks away and comes back with a pillow.
Waiting to interview and found a beer in my purse from last night
Rather than admit to myself I've spent $756 at the bar this month, I'm just going to pretend I gave it to a homeless person...kind of makes me feel better.
also i don't know what you guys ate last night but he broke the toilet
Actually we have similar relationship styles aka no relationship... it could work
For full disclosure: I told my roommates last night that you have a very clean asshole.
WAIT YOU’VE NEVER BEEN TO COSTCO???
COSTCO IS MAGICAL
I can’t believe you two made a group text to scream at me about Costco.
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